NOLA

Because of the way the air feels at ninety degrees and ninety percent humidity -
Because a hard rain's gonna fall.
Because of Tabasco sauce on everything.
Because there's something new to see, everytime you look.
Because of the best po-boys in the world.
Because of sitting on the 'fly and watching the barges go by.
Because of long walks with large daquiris on hot days.
Because of the stink of the Quarter on a Tuesday in the spring.
Because of WWOZ.
Because of sunlight through the leaves of live oaks.
Because angels play their horns in the bars on Saturday nights.
Because of the devil at the crossroads.
Because of the cemetery outside my old front door.
Because of Abita brews.
Because fleurs-de-lis mean something.
Because the Saints might win this time.
Because we rebuilt after the last one.
Because injustice can't last forever.
Because of friends we'll never forget.

Because of something broken and beautiful.

We're still with you, New Orleans.

We never really left.

All my friends back in Louisiana...

So like,



Get the heck out of there!

Of course, I'm too young to remember Katrina, but I am so very sad to see my hometown threatened again...
So y'all just let me and the Monkeys know what we can do to help.
We're with you in spirit!

Special Announcement

So like,

I really wanted Pawlenty to be McCain's VP choice, because I liked his paws. But, I'm happy with McCain's choice of Palin, too. She has waaaay better hair and better clothes than Hillary Clinton. Plus, she lets her husband take care of the kids while she vies for power - rather than riding her husband's coattails to the White House (or anywhere else).
But mostly, I like her record on beauty. She was a beauty queen, and it totally still shows. If I could vote, I think I would probably take the ticket with the beauty queen over the ticket with the stylish man, since the stylish man is already married anyways.

But anyways, if McCain and Palin win, that means Palin's spot as Miss Congeniality will become vacant. And, like, I am TOTALLY up for that job! So I'm just, you know, pre-emptively announcing my candidacy for Beauty Queen.

Right Now!

So, I hope you'll vote for me...



...I have a lifetime of experience being beautiful.

Meow-bama!

So like,

Ooops! I forgot my blog!

Actually, I was so busy with the Concours (I'll put up some pictures later), and then I was off on a cruise for a while, and I had to go to the spa, and get pet-icures on all 22 claws, and visit the duty-free shop, and all that, and I just got soooo tired. But now I am all, totally, energized.

You know why, right?

It's, like, Barack Obama! Did everyone see his speech tonight? He is just so good-looking. Fashionable and well-spoken, too. But I especially like his ears... meow! And his wife looks so fantastic in her ensembles from Maria Pinto... I don't get this thing about being black, though. I mean, black, white, whatever: all monkeys look the same to me.

Though I'm inclined to think Mr. Obama the more catlike of the two candidates: he dresses well and avoids giving straight answers. He's idealistic and, well, not dogged. He has great, big, incredible dreams: his reach exceeds his grasp. Plus, leading the Democratic party must be like herding a bunch of cats...
Although Mr. McCain is pretty feline, as well: he clearly has nine lives. He enjoys a lifestyle he couldn't afford on his own. He masks his pain. His wife's appearance does not change with age. And he vowed to chase his enemies to the gates of Hell - personally, I have chased many a mouse to the same location. And it is well known that cats, everywhere and always, are conservative.

Anyways, so, the real question tonight is: How does Obama's agenda affect the cat population?
And the answer? Well, it doesn't. At least, not as far as I can tell. Mr. Obama did not actually mention cats even once!
So, Mr. Obama, in your next public address, I hope you will talk about the following:

* Universal Cat Treats
* The War on Dogs
* Increased Investment in Comfy Places to Snooze
* Curtailment of the Use of Vacuum Cleaners
* Compulsory Cat Care Education
* Medicinal Catnip

But especially?

Cat suffrage! I mean, don't even talk about dogs - not that it would matter, since dogs are just too dumb to vote, even if they had the legal right to do so. But just think how many millions of kitties would reciprocate your regard, if you promoted feline voting rights. Cats would flow in from all corners of the globe, to the promise of a voice in the American government. And think of what you could promise the American People in return: Fewer mouses in our houses! Fewer rats on the streets! Fewer irritating songbirds waking the American People from their well-deserved slumbers after hard days' work. More cuteness. More furriness. More purrs and more pets. And increased cat food consumption, which would be a huge spur to the domestic economy.

Think it over, Mr. Obama.



I know you'll see things my way.

Olympics, schmolympics.

So like,

Speaking of sports, right? Today was the start of the Olympics, and I just have to say, what's the point? I mean, so, these monkeys on TV can do flips. Well, a cat will do flips, but only if there's a bird or mouse or something tasty like that involved.
The monkeys on TV run fast. Who cares? A cat will run fast - or even speedwalk - if it's catfood time!
The TV monkeys swim. Seriously. Like, who wants to swim? I prefer to get my fish dinners at a restaurant, thanks.
The olympic monkeys do team sports. I don't EVEN understand that one... have you ever seen a kitty on a team? A cat team? I don't think so. I REALLY don't think so.

So I mean, really, what's the point? AND! Did you see those outfits the US team was wearing? I'm sorry, but Ralph Lauren is so, like, 1980-whatever. White hats? Please. Did you ever see a cat wearing a white hat?

Anyways, since the TV Olympics are so lame, I've decided to have my own Olympics for the actually cool people who read my blog.

So, without further ado, tonight's event is Olympic Scratching:



Check out that form - that execution - that style!
Looks like I won the gold!

The Saints are coming!

So like,

I am soooo excited about the Saints this year! Did you see the preseason game tonight? Twenty-four to TEN, baby! They TOTALLY stomped the Cardinals. Drew Brees was just fabulous, meow, and it was great to see Robert Meachem looking healthy after last year. Plus, it totally looks like Reggie Bush is concentrating less on endorsements and more on actually playing football (although I don't really mind the endorsements, but I kinda wish he'd endorse something like Maserati or Tag Heuer, ya know?).

So, that'll be great, and I reeeally can't wait until the season begins!

I mean, what can I say? I sport their colors...



I'm a Who Cat!

The Cat Returns

So like,

Sorry it's been so long, and all...
but I mean, who needs monkeys, anyways?

So, after the monkeys abandoned me, I went to check out the MotoGP at Laguna Seca, and I met up with this hot Italian guy named Valentino. Meow! He is a big deal in Europe - so now I am, too. Here is a pic from our latest photoshoot - I am looking mysterious and alluring, but Valentino always looks like SUCH a goofball:



Anyways, Italy was fantastic and I can't wait to go back, especially since I got SO MANY cute shoes while I was there. I mean, Carmel is supposed to have good shopping, but it's just, like, WISHING it could be Milan, you know? But, anyways, I had to come back because I was already invited to a bunch of events at the Concours d'Elegance and that starts next week.
So, like, seeya there! Meow!