mewwwwwwwwwwl?

So like...

Those monkeys left yesterday, and they haven't come back!
They were saying something about "bar exam" when they left...
And now a different monkey is feeding me.
Did they get lost in the wilderness?
Did they get eaten by predators?
Now who will keep me warm at night?
Who will buy me presents?
Who will give me their credit card?!



Monkeys, where did you go?!

Editor's note: The monkeys are gone for the week to take the bar exam, while an alternate monkey takes very good care of Talley. Wish good luck to all!

65 and still fabulous

So like,


Par-tay like a California Monkey...
and take me with you!
Meow!

Irresistable

So like...

have you ever tried those little spongy protector things that go around i-pod earbuds? I mean, like, have you ever eaten one?
Personally, I find them completely irresistable.
Meow!

So, this morning I ate one off an i-pod that got left out on the table... then one of the monkeys caught me and put the earbuds away before I could eat the second one.

I was so mad! but, I got back at him...
This afternoon, he was listening to a lecture on his i-pod, I grabbed it from him and ate another earbud protector before he could even react! Yeah!

The monkeys totally couldn't believe I'd eaten it. They looked for the thing for a long time, while I just sat there, licking my lips.

When the finally figured out what had happened, they were so upset!
They think I'm crazy...



I think I'm just starved for attention.

Boooooored.

So like...

The monkeys are obsessed with studying now. They never leave...
never do anything fun...
never go away and give me a chance to sneak out or have a party at home...



This kitty is SO BORED!

Seriously Weird Monkeys...

So like...

these crazy monkeys!

They are jumping up and down and hooting and screeching...
apparently it's some kind of celebration for being done with their bar exam study lectures...

Bleh!



Wake me up when it's over!

Shoe Process

So like...

I've been starting on my own line of designer goods, and it's gonna be sooooo hot!

What I do is take an existing product that is ugly,
and then I fix it.
I use my unique sensitivity and special cat abilites...

Check it out!

Girl monkey brings home a brand new pair of shoes:



I see the aesthetic potential and embark on a creative journey:











When the creative journey is finished, I have transformed the shoes into a unique work of art --
Behold!



The detail... the texture...
this is truly a meowsterpiece!

Public Menace, for real.

So like...

I got attacked by a Dog yesterday...

after I sneaked out the open window.

Of course, I am waaay smarter than the dogs and I was never in any danger, because dogs can't climb trees! HAH!

U know what I say to U, DOGS!?

Those Bad Monkeys

So like,

I got this email last night:

> Dear Talleycat,
> M.E.O.W. My Exam Occurs, When?
> Thank goodness your monkeys are not stressing out
> over the bar which they will be taking in less than 3
> weeks. Love, Granny

I'm gonna sit down and write a serious answer.



Dear Granny,

I know, right?!

I mean, like, how are they going to keep buying me cars and designer handbags and jewelry and cat food and things like that, if they don't even pass the bar?

I mean, so, I'm totally on their case every day. I've got twenty-two claws and I am SO not afraid to use them...



or my numerous sharp teeth!

I wake the monkeys up early every single day to make sure they get a good start on studying (after giving me breakfast), and I pester them constantly to get them to work harder (and to give me cat treats).




So, you can be sure those bad monkeys are learning their stuff and will pass the bar on their first try!
But, it is all thanks to me,
your dutiful grand-cat,

-Talley

Independence Day

So like...
It's the Fourth of July...
And I think that's waaaay Fabulous.
I mean, so, have a happy Independence Day and all of that...



Just let me know when the fireworks are over.

Meow!

Due Process

So like...
that wasn't even fair.

I mean, you know, maybe I was kind of a bad kitty, but it is SO WRONG to let DOGS post on my blog...
It's cruel and unusual punishment!

Where are my rights, peoples?!?

Don't kitties get constitutional protections?

I didn't even get a trial or anything!

I am so, seriously mad right now...



I'm calling my lawyer.